Obedience

Obedience - Define obedience. What motivates you to obey your Dom/Master?

Merriam-Webster Online defines “obedience" as:

1. a : an act or instance of obeying

          b : the quality or state of being obedient

2. : a sphere of jurisdiction; especially : an ecclesiastical or sometimes secular dominion

It also defines “obey” as:

1. : to follow the commands or guidance of
2. : to conform to or comply with <obey an order> <falling objects obey the laws of physics>

In this lifestyle, whether submissive or slave, obedience is an important skill to have.

Yes, I called obedience a skill. The reason for that is because it is something we must learn. Obedience is not something that comes naturally. In a very real sense, it is the evidence of true submission. There are times when, no matter how much we may desire to obey, there are simply issues that may prevent us from being able to do so.

The issues are as numerous and as varied as those person's whom live this lifestyle, but it boils down to either psychological and physical issues.

Physical is fairly simple to explain, and much easier to work around. It simply means that there is a physical reason that prevents us from obeying a particular command. A person might be temporarily sick (i.e. has the flu), or have some sort of physical (i.e. broken arm) or medical (i.e. Fibromyalgia) ailment that limits our capabilities whether temporarily or permanently.

Psychological is not quite as simple. Perhaps there are trust issues. Perhaps the task at hand triggers memories of past abuses. Perhaps we simply do not “FEEL” like obeying on a particular day. Perhaps there are other hidden issues that have yet to be explored or confronted.

Whatever the psychological issue, learning obedience is always a bit of a “work in progress.” It does become easier with time and with practice, but there are still times when it's a struggle.

That said... for me obedience is quite often a serious struggle. I'm not talking as much about the sexual side of this lifestyle, as I am the 24/7 aspect, outside of the bedroom.

In the bedroom, obedience is less of an option. If I choose to not obey, Sir will simply make me obey and it also makes the time in the bedroom much more enjoyable for me to be forcibly made to obey. It is among my greatest turn-ons to be physically restrained and/or otherwise forced to do something that I otherwise do not wish to do.

Obedience outside of the bedroom is far more difficult. It is not that I do not desire to obey, I do... it's that I am lazy. Yes, I have a serious character flaw... I am L-A-Z-Y.

I know this to be true. It is something I have dealt with my entire life and it is NOT something that is easily overcome. This is something in which I need consistent help from Sir to overcome.

When the task at hand is something that I deem unpleasant, I need Him to be firm with me. I need Him to set clear, consistent goals for me to accomplish and clear and consistent consequences when those goals have not been accomplished without acceptable justification.

For me, the ability to be able to look back at an accomplishment, no matter how good that may feel, is simply not a strong enough motivation to be consistently obedient. It is however a nice bonus!

A greater motivation is knowing that my accomplishment will be pleasing to Sir.

To have Sir come home in the evenings and look around to see that the house has been cleaned or laundry completed or to know that I have made certain that our bills have been paid and kept up to date, or whatever the particular task may have been on that particular day, and to hear His acknowledgment of it and to know that He is pleased that I did as he asked or expected of me, THAT is what truly motivates me.

My willingness to do as He has asked of me, makes Him feel loved and respected by myself and our children. To be able to make Him feel that way is perhaps my strongest motivational factor of all.